Am i the only one?

Today is Sunday, March 20, 2010.
Today has been a very lonely day for me.
At church this morning, Pastor Dave gave the message and he again stated something I find quite profound: "Belonging is very powerful."

Belonging IS very powerful.
Belonging is VERY powerful.
Belonging is very POWERFUL.

Where do I belong?

Have you ever felt like you exist, but don't really belong anywhere per se? I think maybe I feel just 'not special' and I just want to feel 'special'. I want to feel like I am adored, like I am loved because I am me. I want to feel the specialness of being the only daughter still alive. I want to feel like I am loved because her son chose me and for no other reason. I want to feel loved plurally. I feel very, very singular.

I am very glad I have no sons and therefore, will have no 'daughters-in-laws'. I will strive very hard to teach my daughters to love their husband's mothers & fathers . . . to walk in love . . . I want so much to set the example, I am just confounded with how hard it is to walk that way.
I am amazed how the world entices us with its pleasures and we are so easily 'ensnared'. Hebrews 12:1-2 "Because we are surrounded by a community of believers, let us put off everything that hinders and the sin which so easily ensnares and let us run with perservance the race marked out for us."

Dear Lord Jesus, thank you for loving me while I was still your enemy. Thank you for your atoning death for my sin. Thank you for hearing my cries. Thank you for always loving me, no matter what. Thank you Lord Jesus for being my plural. You are my "exceedinly great reward"!